Goodbye. But see you soon-ish.
By Gregory Jacobs-Roseman (composer-lyricist)
That is solemn we have ended
Be it but a Play
Or a Glee among the Garret
Or a Holiday
Or a leaving Home, or later
Parting with a World
We have understood for better
Still to be explained
–Emily Dickinson
Less-than-flattering shot I took from my laptop while writing this. #nofilter
Hello, dear citizens of Crazytown, and Merry Christmas. I hope you are having the best possible holiday, however you are celebrating. Be it in a warm house filled with family, or at your apartment with Netflix and Chinese delivery, Christmas is a time to pause the daily grind and recharge, even for a big Jew like yours truly.
This is the last official posting day of this Crazytown term, and of 2015. And as bittersweet as it is, I must make an announcement: this is my final post as a regular contributor to Crazytown.
I’ve had a difficult time making this decision. After four years, three months, two weeks, and four days since my first post there’s a lot on which to reflect. But after all that time as both a secondary and then primary contributor, I felt it was time to move on, and that the new year should bring new beginnings for me and new voices to the blog.
When I joined Crazytown in August of 2011, the blog was still navigating the really exciting transition into an artist’s space of multiple contributors. We had monthly meetings at Ryan Scott Oliver’s apartment where we would discuss how to better the blog, give it a solid foundation, and where we wanted it to go in the future; what we wanted it to say and stand for. We agreed that Crazytown should always be “an Artist’s Asylum,” and an online oasis of inspiration for the creatively minded. In the years since, I think that is exactly what the blog has become and will continue to be.
I have so loved writing for this blog and reading my colleagues’ posts. I love every term when new writers join our ranks and I get to discover a new voice. It is this need for newness and freshness that has been my primary reason for leaving Crazytown as a regular contributor. I felt it was time to let in some new blood. As the last of the old guard (well, the like, middle old guard – there was Crazytown before me) still actively writing, I felt it was time to mix things up.
How can I reflect on 4.3 years at Crazytown? Probably the best example for me of the impact and reach the blog has had are the multiple times I have struck up a conversation with someone at an NYC piano bar or via email correspondence and they’ve said to me: “you’re Gregory Jacobs-Roseman? I’m a regular reader of Crazytown.” That has always been the best affirmation that what we do here is indeed not in a vacuum.
This was a thing we tried once. Never actually happened due to poor ticket sales.
As a writer, Crazytown has been a blessing of an outlet. Some weeks have been more prolific than others, but even when life had kicked me in the balls and I took to Crazytown to write about it, I knew I was doing so as part of a community of artists, rather than bitching alone in my own little corner of the internet. That sense of belonging to something larger than yourself is very important to me – it’s why I got into theatre in the first place, and why my time at Crazytown has been so productive.
And productive it has been. From my very first post, to the old days of giving my own version of holiday advice or digging in deep about life in general, I feel I’ve truly found an outlet here, which is why I’m resolved to not disappear entirely. I will continue on posting as a guest contributor from time to time when I really feel there is something that I must say to the unique audience we have here at Crazytown.
If I can leave Crazytown with any final thought, it would be this: be confident. It’s a weird thing to go out on, but it’s the one thought I’ve struggled with most as an artist over the years. This being our artist’s asylum, I think it’s the best thing I can leave for you. All too often we get caught up in our heads and our self-imposed doubt. Am I good enough? Do I have a right to voice opinions on this? Is what I’m creating not original, authentic, or etc.? Just cut that shit out. Know that those voices will always be in your head, but when you hear them, tell them to fuck off. Or as a group of collaborators smarter than me once said: “die, vampire, die.” Be brave, be confident, and throw your work out into the world. Force yourself to do it with abandon, but also with routine. There is no substitute for a deadline.
I love each and every one of you, and will see you very soon.
-GJR
GREGORY JACOBS-ROSEMAN is a composer/lyricist and theatrical sound designer. His musical Save The Date: A Wedding Road-Trip Musical won the Overall Excellence Award for a Musical in the 2013 New York International Fringe Festival. gregjr.com
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